Let’s Talk About Sex
It is very common for women to have clashing emotions about their appearance after giving birth. After all a popping tummy, lactating breast, skin changes, edematous feet, possible varicose veins, hair loss, vaginal discharge, increasing sweating, urinary incontinence and flatulence definitely does not sound too stimulating. Aside from this, giving birth causes trauma to the vagina which adds to the anxiety of intercourse However sex after pregnancy happens. Initially, vaginal soreness and fatigue leave its mark. Just in case you are in the mood or even if it’s the last thing on your mind I will inform you about what you need to know about sex after giving birth and ways to be intimate after having a baby.
There is no exact wait period to resume sexual intercourse although it is recommended by healthcare providers to wait until your 4 to 6-weeks after giving birth and check-up with you physician. If you choose to not wait, this may not allow your body the time needed to heal and also if there are any complications that may occur after giving birth, they will happen in the first few weeks. If you had a vaginal tear or required an episiotomy you are encouraged to wait or may be told to wait longer at your follow up appointment to avoid risk of infection.

Will there be pain?
Hormonal changes that occur after childbearing may leave your vagina dry and tender. You may experience this more with vaginal delivery and depending on the degree of tear or episiotomy. You may also experience a period of low libido and all of these things are very normal.
Things to focus on to ease discomfort:
- Discuss alternatives to vaginal intercourse, such self pleasure after pregnancy, oral sex or mutual masturbation. Make sure you tell your partner what feels good and what doesn’t.
- Pain relief. Take pain medication before hand, warm bath, apply ice, and empty bladder.
- Make time. This may not be the spontaneous way you are use too however this helps with relaxation and preparing so that you are not too tired or anxious.
- Perform Kegels
Here are the steps of how to do Kegels
- Make sure your bladder is empty, then sit or lie down.
- Tighten your pelvic floor muscles. Hold tight and count 3 to 5 seconds.
- Relax the muscles and count 3 to 5 seconds. Don’t forget to breath!
- Repeat 10 times, 3 times a day (morning, afternoon, and night).

If sex remains painful, follow up with your healthcare provider so that they could refer you to a pelvic floor specialist or appropriate treatment options. Also, if you just seem to have no interest and are struggling with the idea, talk to your health care provider as these may be signs of post partum depression.
Is Breastfeeding a form of birth control?
You will require a reliable method of birth control and breastfeeding is not a dependable source. In order to have another healthy pregnancy and avoid complications or other health issues, often health care providers suggest waiting at lest 18-24 months before bearing your next child. Talk to your health care provider who is the most experienced with your health history about family planning and pregnancy spacing before you deliver your next baby. furthermore, they will be able to discuss your birth control options.
So now that you have some more insight of this steamy topic, just relax and enjoy some much-needed pleasures, drink some water, eat well and it’s time to get your groove back!
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Article by Sonia Joshi.
Sonia Joshi is a Registered Practical Nurse and a mother of a toddler. Sonia Joshi has been working in the Postpartum, Mother and Baby Unit for over 10 years. Sonia is an accomplished health care provider known for compassion as well as excellent communication and interpersonal skills. Sonia is a diligent and resourceful individual who demonstrates clear ability to work comfortably with patients, families and the entire healthcare team under the pressures that may arise. Sonia received her RPN from Seneca College. Over her years of experience Sonia is certified with the college of nurses of Ontario. Sonia is certified in CPR and First Aid, Neonatal Resuscitation Program, RNAO Breast Feeding, and Sugar Temperature Airway Blood Pressure Lab work Emotional Support (S.T.A.B.L.E.) Sonia also has experience teaching nursing students while they are placed with her for their training.